I'm sure I have said many times that life is full of ups, downs, going left, going right and sometimes just going the wrong way.  It can be such a struggle to find your way back to the right path with so many other things pulling you in different directions.  It's difficult at times to know what's right, which decision to make and all in all can be quite a stress on the body, mind and soul.  For the past few posts looking back they have been rather down, some have even said depressing where people have worried and weren't sure how to deal with my emotional roller coaster.  Now I can honestly say that things have lifted, mind sets have changed and I finally feel as though I'm headed to where I need to be.  The more I type I can't help but wonder; with so many different roads in life, what is it that makes us end up on the right one?

For some period I felt as though I was on a different side of the road to everyone around me.  I was sitting in the slow lane with everyone zipping past me and waving frantically as I lagged behind.  I wasn't sure what I needed to do to get back there, back to where I wanted to be in life where I felt I had purpose, where I belonged.  There was a lot of soul searching, a lot of down time and even a lot of crying about what it was I knew deep down made me happy.  What it was that got me out of bed and had a smile on my face and the usual hop in my step.  Many things needed to be changed and there was only one person who could help me.  That person was me.

I started to think about my life in all its different aspects.  After what felt like an eternity I was able to break it down into 3 parts of what has the most bearing in my life.  Love, Life & Work.  I knew at the same time that one will affect the other, there are different things about me and different things that make me happy.  It's all about heart, it's all about brains and it's all about courage.  The heart is to feel, the brains is to think and the courage is to know that no matter what life throws our way, we are strong enough to get through it.

There came a point in my sales role where I knew there was an opportunity for me to find something different, something better.  Redundancies were coming through and I was able to take that opportunity as a door to something else, something completely different in a company which has many different avenues and channels to choose from.  I managed to find a role in Marketing, as a Campaign Manager on a 3 month secondment.  After a month and a half I know this is the road for me.  It's something that I love to do and really can get passionate about, sink my teeth into and really work in an area that keeps my interest.  One of the 3 has fallen into place.

Life for me is my home, my friends, family and the ability to socialise.  I had become a hermit, spending all my time locked away in a room where I could just dwell on things that kept me feeling.  So disjointed from the world where I wasn't sure who or what I was anymore.  I'm moving out, moving on to something completely different than what I have been used to since moving here.  I'm moving in with people more like the person I know that I am, people who enjoy to be out and about and apart of the bigger picture.  I can feel the shift, the merge even back to a road which is more me, my speed limit and with some great people in the passenger seat.

Love.. The one thing I hold so close to me that it's one of the most obvious things about what I'm wanting from my life.  I missed feeling, for so long I had never felt anything so strong.  My low point made me realise that I had the ability to feel.  I can feel lonely and I know that there is always the opposite side to the spectrum; I can feel love.  Right now there is someone in my life that is making me feel that again, I'm feeling something strong and the feeling is mutual.  We all know what I can be like and I'm taking this one differently, I'm going with it; No pressure, no politics. Just feeling.

Dorothy had to follow the yellow brick road and thinking about it the whole story can be related back to normal life in how there are many different things that can take one off a path, but it's how we get back to it that really matters.  It's part of the growing process, part of becoming a better person.  The characters in the story are a simplified version of what it takes to make up a total person.  Someone with heart, brains and courage.  The roads we take build us, allow us to feel, open our minds to think and give us the courage to keep going.  No matter how far you think you've gone, no matter how far away you feel, look into yourself and listen for that voice. 

At the end of the day if we follow our heart, listen to our intuition and believe in our inner strength, no matter what road we're on we will always end up heading in the right direction.  Ask yourself how often you follow it, listen to it and believe in it.  In the end we need to look after ourselves and our own lives as it's a long and windy road with many different intersections and cross roads.  Even if right now you're at a stop light, take a look in the rear view mirror and know that in the end it will turn green and the heart, brains and courage are your inner fuel to get you to where you belong.

Mik ;)